In moments of discomfort or embarrassment and sometimes fear. Leers and judgements that come from anywhere and everywhere. All encompassing, no start or end, it just exists and never goes away.
Walking a bit quicker, crossing over to the other side, sitting in the back seat, getting off a bus, changing seats on a train, looking down to avoid eye contact, doing up your coat, leaving early, telling people where you’ll be.
Being groped: by a stranger on a tram or your new boyfriend’s middle aged father. A kindly neighbour giving you a lift home when you’re tipsy then feeling your breasts as he opens the door to let you out. Using the public toilet as a child and have a man expose his penis. An encounter with a colleague who turns out to be a sexual predator that targets all the new young female staff members. Leaving a violent partner to be told no-one can help.
Of course there are good men: loving father, treasured son, beloved grandad, favourite uncle, supportive friend, big brother, helpful neighbour, encouraging co-worker, great boss, fellow traveller, great doctor, thoughtful stranger, helpful mechanic, lovely teacher.
This is not about men. This is about highlighting the everyday experience of most women. Realising that it doesn’t have to be like this. Coming together as a society to make changes. Making the world a safer place for everyone.